Oh, The Pressure

Boy, was I ready for the calendar to flip to February. While I always love the start of a new month, something about January ending seemed like it couldn’t come fast enough. I spent most of January feeling very low energy, craving quiet nights in and space in my schedule even more than usual. Post-holiday blues coupled with guilt over not being as goal oriented as I felt I “should” caused many days of just going through the motions.

There’s just something about January, isn’t there? Everywhere you look, you’re reminded that you’re supposed to be better. Magazine articles urge you to lose your bad habits, supermarkets prominently display their 100 calorie snack packs, and there is a general sense of “starting over” everywhere. Even here.

You see, the land of blogging is also the land of self improvement. You put your goals out there, you report back, you’re held a little bit more accountable than usual. But what if you don’t accomplish any of your goals? What if you slink home after work, make a piece of cinnamon toast for dinner and watch 5 back-to-back episodes of How I Met Your Mother?

But the very best part is, I know so many of you are right there with me. So what if I didn’t make my bed every day or find a new yoga studio? I did what came easily to me, and took a month to relax and restore myself.

I cleaned out my closet. I read 3 books (Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?, The Paris Wife, and One Day), I caught up with a very dear friend over Vietnamese food. I went to a Thievery Corporation concert. I watched many hours of Downton Abbey. I made a delicious new soup and helped make my boyfriend’s famous chili. I made many cups of tea. I slept until noon. I had brunch in the city, browsed Eastern Market, and spent a blissful afternoon in a used bookstore.

And now, it’s February, and my planner boasts a new set of goals that I’ll aspire to achieve, piece by piece. But really, if I just accomplish painting my nails red, snuggling up with my beau on Valentine’s Day, and being a little less hard on myself? Well, that would be just fine with me.

{Image via Pinterest}

Just As I Am

 May today there be peace within. May you trust that you are exactly where you are meant to be. May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith in yourself and others. May you use the gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you. May you be content with yourself just the way you are.

Mother Teresa

Oh, January. Such a special month you are. With reminders of how we're supposed to lose weight, eat more vegetables, and simplify our lives everywhere we turn, the message of self improvement is clear. With that and the noticeable lack of twinkle lights and champagne, it can all seem a bit daunting. Clearly, I love making goals and striving to be the best version of myself, but the focus on starting anew can be a road block that stops us from seeing how blessed we are, right here and now.

I read this article on one of my favorite blogs last week, and haven't been able to stop thinking about it. Sarah very eloquently writes, "...this year, I don’t have a benchmark or milestone to reach. This year, I want to lean into living the life that’s right in front of me, right now." Isn't that a wonderful thought as we start the year? Lean into living the life that's right here before us, accept how and who we are right at this very moment? 

I struggle with this daily, and don't we all? I want to challenge myself to see the beauty in my lovely little life. Instead of beating myself up for gaining a few pounds during the holidays, why not step back and realize I'm likely the only one that notices? Instead of feeling lonely as I drive away from my family and friends back in Ohio, why not fill these blustery January evenings with meeting up with friends that are becoming near and dear? Instead of multi-tasking and checking Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram every 5 minutes, why not set my phone aside and be fully present during an evening with my beau?

So, for this weekend at least, I'm keeping my "goals" simple - cook something in the CrockPot on Sunday, finish the book I'm reading and start the next, go on a brisk winter walk, and all the while think to myself that I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, snug jeans and all.

{Image via Pinterest}

Snow, Paris, and Nail Polish

I'm one of those strange people who prefers cold weather to warm, and would much rather bundle up and take a brisk walk through the snow over a dip in the pool. Though I enjoy living in a place that experiences all the seasons, I'd place summer firmly in last place. Boots, scarves, sweater dresses, fuzzy blankets, and hot tea are my recipe for happiness. 

You can image that I've been slightly disappointed in our mild winter thus far. I was definitely in a sour mood when it was 65+ degrees on Saturday, and was just dying for snow. You can imagine my happiness when I looked out my office window this afternoon to see those fluffy flakes falling from the sky. Thank goodness! 

Aside from the snow, here a few other things that are making me happy right now. 

• The Paris Wife, Paula McLain's lush novel that has whisked me away to 1920s Paris and made me fall slightly in love with Hemingway myself.
• Essie's Cocktail Bling nail polish, the perfect pale gray/blue for this time of year. 
• Downton Abbey, Masterpiece Classic's superb British costume drama & the perfect anecdote to the post-holiday blues
• Even though I've always been a stripes girl, I've currently having a love affair with polka dots.
•  I finally caved and bought a bottle of sriracha hot sauce, and I can't get enough! I've been putting it on everything, my favorite being eggs, veggie burgers, and noodle dishes.

I hope you can curl up with your favorite things this evening and enjoy this fabulous winter weather! 

{Image via Pinterest}

Clean Slate

And the time came when the risk it took to remain the bud 

was more painful than the risk it took to bloom.

Anais Nin

Ten days in Ohio was just what my soul needed: inside jokes, curling up under a fluffy blanket, countless mugs of tea made by my mom, harmonizing around the piano, and eating every Christmas cookie I came across. The problem, of course, was that it was over in the blink of an eye. As with most things that we look forward to and spend months planning for, time presses on. Before I knew it, I'd loaded up my car with my stuffed suitcase (anyone else a chronic over-packer?) and hit the lonely road back to DC. 

Of course, after settling in, unpacking, and watching a few episodes of Downton Abbey, everything looked a little rosier. Being back in a routine has always been a better fit for me, and I have been cherishing the new perspective that some time away has given me. As I mentioned before I headed home for the holidays, I spent some time mid-December brainstorming goals & dreams for 2012. Now that we're officially in "resolution" territory, I thought I'd share a few things I hope to accomplish and/or keep in mind for this month. 

•  Attend 1 yoga class at an actual studio: after my beloved yoga studio in my neighborhood closed, I haven't yet found another place to practice. I'm going to research a few that are in the area and attend at least one class this month.
• Make my bed every day: It's such a simple thing, really, and just takes a few minutes. But this small act helps me feel more prepared for the day, and instantly puts me at ease when I come home. 
• Weekly phone calls with my best friend: I've been very blessed to have the same best friend for 24 years, since the first grade. In the final weeks leading up to Christmas, he and I talked several times a week, solidifying our plans for the holidays. I want to make a conscious effort to pick up the phone once a week, so we can keep up-to-date on those day to day details. 
• Spend more time reading: I set a goal on Goodreads to read 25 books this year. While I do always have a book on the go (and am part of a wonderful book club), I only read 16 books this past year! I'm well on my way to my goal, already having finished one book (Mindy Kaling's excellent "Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?") and started my second (this month's book club pick, "The Paris Wife").
• Plan a weekend getaway: A goal that fell flat for fall was planning a little weekend getaway with my beau. This month (even if it doesn't happen until February or March), I'd like to find a cozy little cabin with a fireplace that's just an hour or 2 away. 

Wishing you all a lovely start to this brand new year.  

{Image via Pinterest}

Yin and Yang

"They'll be parties for hosting, marshmallows for toasting, and carolers out in the snow..."

In a lot of ways, this really is the most wonderful time of the year. There is the opportunity to gather together with our nearest & dearest, give thoughtful presents, and savor twinkle lights. My calendar is full of sparkly events where I'll be sipping eggnog and donning party dresses, but it teeters on overabundance. As wonderful as this time of year is, it can make me glad that January follows December -- a time for new beginnings, goal setting, and quinoa. 

After finishing those final to-dos at work and affixing that last bow, on Friday I head to Ohio for a week with my friends and family. Many traditions await: songs to be sung, hugs to be given and received, and I couldn't be more excited. But as it always is with my ever-present quest to stay in the moment, it's easy to worry about finances or calories or fitting in enough down time.

Last week, I spent an evening brainstorming my 2012 wishes & dreams. I just put pen to paper and allowed any thought that came into my head to be jotted down on the list. An ideal me emerged -- someone who wakes up an hour earlier, makes her bed every morning, goes to yoga weekly, and finds time for reading and regular phone calls with her best friends. Giving myself the opportunity to do that was incredibly therapeutic -- and doing so before turning the calendar to the new year was a fantastic way to clean the slate during this season of abundance. 

Now begins the challenge to enjoy these remaining December days -- slender bank account and endless cookies and all. There will be plenty of time for fresh starts, Monday mornings, and kale in just a few weeks. For now, huddling around the piano with my dearest friends and enjoying one more glass of prosecco sounds pretty darn good. 

Happy, happy holidays.

{Image via Pinterest}

Shake It Up

Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment
is the only one you know you have for sure.

Oprah Winfrey

I love routines. Even when I was a child, vacations from school were difficult since they lacked that structure and schedule. Days spent organizing, crossing things off of lists, and then cocooning at home with a favorite TV show or book are my favorite. But, even for a type-A introvert like myself, change and shaking up your normal routine can do wonders for the soul. This week, I've had several occasions where life has been eager to show me this simple truth. 

On Tuesday, my beau and I went out for dinner. Sure, it was a Groupon dinner date, but I put on earrings and lipstick and was whisked away to a cozy little restaurant not far from my apartment. The decor was intimate and inviting --  simple flower arrangements in mason jars adorned the table, and ample candles flickered throughout the space. We savored a wonderful meal and even split dessert, and as we ambled out into the rainy streets afterward, I felt relaxed and blessed. All that on a random Tuesday evening! 

It was a simple pleasure: a meal shared together without sitting in front of the TV or thinking about washing the dishes, a time to pause mid-week and truly enjoy each other's company, and truly amazing gelato. And to think, I'd almost thought it was too much trouble to gussy up and head out to dinner. After work, I had a slight headache and thought how much easier it would be to just grab a burrito bowl from Chipotle and do the normal Tuesday routine. 

Tonight, I had a free evening and wanted to catch up on e-mail, blogs, and my book after a busy day at work. Instead of just hunkering down in my apartment, I decided to head to the coffee shop just a block from my building. That's where I sit now, drinking a hot chocolate and wondering why I don't do this more often. I'm the queen of making time for myself, but how often do I do something like this, where I am out enjoying the people, sights, and sounds of my neighborhood? I just may make this a weekly date with myself. 

In the midst of this yuletide season, when obligations, shopping lists, and expectations can dominate our lives, I'm going to try to connect with myself and others around me, and shake things up a little bit. 

What can you do to shake up your routine this week? 

{Image courtesy of Pinterest}

Ring A Ling

Something about staying in town for Thanksgiving actually put me in the holiday spirit earlier than in recent years. Without the rushed, hectic nature of traveling, I could settle in to watch Elf the night of Thanksgiving, and make time on Sunday to decorate my Christmas tree instead of sitting in traffic. In no time flat, I'd programmed my DVR to program all of my favorite holiday movies (White Christmas, Holiday Inn, A Christmas Story, Charlie Brown Christmas), and switched my Pandora station to Bing Crosby and the Andrews Sisters. Nothing puts a swing in my step like listening to their rendition of Jingle Bells. 

Music is a huge part of my life despite the season, but the nostalgic nature of Christmas bring it to the forefront during this time of year. I absolutely love to sing. I actually had my first solo on Christmas Eve when I was just 6 years old, and was very involved in choirs, show choirs, and musicals until I graduated from college. Unless you've done karaoke with me recently (Madonna's Like A Prayer is my staple number), many people I know now aren't familiar with this part of me.

During the holidays, one of the things I look forward to the most is singing. While occasionally it's breaking into a hilarious version of Silver Bells with my friends, music is a major part of why the holidays are so special to me. 

For the past few years, my two best friends from high school would join me in singing for the holiday party at my grandma's nursing home. We would dust off some of our favorites from our choir days, as well as trying out some new numbers. Because my grandma was in a Memory Care/Alzheimer's program, it was always amazing to me to see the effect that music would have on these older folks. They joyfully sang along with almost everything, even if other words (and faces) were harder to recognize. My grandma passed away earlier this year, so we won't be singing there, but I'm still looking forward to getting together with my dear friends and huddling around the piano. It's one of the traditions that I look forward to the most every year. 

I'm also looking forward to joining voices with two other close friends and singing Gesu Bambino at church on Christmas Eve. We've lost count of how many years we've sung this together, but it really wouldn't be Christmas without it. It's fitting that the building where I had my first solo 24 years ago is still the place I raise my voice every year.

One of my goals in the New Year is to find a way to sing more regularly -- all suggestions welcome! Do you have any special holiday traditions that could be a bigger part year round?

{Image via Pinterest}