I've been thinking a lot lately about the concept of "being perfect". As anyone close to me knows, I can be a bit of perfectionist (read: high strung Monica Gellar). I greatly dislike finding that I've made a mistake at work, upset a friend, worn the "wrong" outfit to a social gathering, or not done everything in my power to make something the best it can be. But recently, a busy schedule and preparing for out of town guests has made me realize that it's time to let go of my eternal quest for perfection.
My beau & I hosted friends from out of town this past weekend in our cozy (i.e. 800 square foot) apartment. Since I had only been living there a month, I barely felt comfortable myself, let alone ready to double the capacity and play hostess. I started stressing out, picturing the mountains of work to be done - cleaning, making sure the kitchen was stocked with ideal snack & breakfast options, and even buying items to make certain everything is in order. But then, after a particularly heated conversation with my much more logical beau, I realized that the MOST important thing I needed to prepare was my attitude. Being in good spirits and not stressed out would make a much larger impact than a perfectly timed breakfast casserole and fresh flowers adorning the table.
As I was in the throes of my hostess prep, I read this fantastic post by Amy at The Anxious Hippie, and she shared the most beautiful sentiment regarding perfection: If you're one of those people who appears perfect, everyone probably hates you, because vulnerability is what makes us relatable and likable. Bingo! Isn't that so completely true?
I think about a few people that I know that "have it all together" - you know the type, always perfectly manicured, wearing the perfect outfit, and seemingly doing more before 10am than I do in an entire day. But, being around them makes me feel anxious and sub par. When I'm with people who don't hide their flaws & fears and are therefore vulnerable, I feel comfortable and relaxed. So, why not be that kind of a friend to others? Why not say to my guest "let's chat while I make up your bed" instead of setting a ridiculously early alarm to have it all picture perfect before they arrive?
This, of course, is one tiny step on my journey to accepting myself for who I am, but an important one. Letting our vulnerability shine is something we can all do for each other, and in the world of the Facebook & Instagram "highlight reel", it's something we could all stand to do a little more of.
{Image via Pinterest}
1 comment:
I love this. My dad and I were driving home from a day trip and stopped by a relative's house on the way on the spur of the moment last December, and although it was clearly lived-in -- not picked up, not vacuumed, etc., and they have a four-year-old, so there's that element too -- they were so warm and kind and happy to see us and didn't apologize for the state of the house (which would make us have to reassure them), but just welcomed us in and got right down to the point, which was spending time together. That was a great lesson for me, having grown up feeling like if the house isn't as perfect as you can get it before guests arrive, you're not being a good hostess. My relatives were amazing hosts, because they focused on the important things and didn't worry about the unimportant ones. Thanks for this post...it was awesome!
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