I've been thinking a lot lately about the concept of "being perfect". As anyone close to me knows, I can be a bit of perfectionist (read: high strung Monica Gellar). I greatly dislike finding that I've made a mistake at work, upset a friend, worn the "wrong" outfit to a social gathering, or not done everything in my power to make something the best it can be. But recently, a busy schedule and preparing for out of town guests has made me realize that it's time to let go of my eternal quest for perfection.
My beau & I hosted friends from out of town this past weekend in our cozy (i.e. 800 square foot) apartment. Since I had only been living there a month, I barely felt comfortable myself, let alone ready to double the capacity and play hostess. I started stressing out, picturing the mountains of work to be done - cleaning, making sure the kitchen was stocked with ideal snack & breakfast options, and even buying items to make certain everything is in order. But then, after a particularly heated conversation with my much more logical beau, I realized that the MOST important thing I needed to prepare was my attitude. Being in good spirits and not stressed out would make a much larger impact than a perfectly timed breakfast casserole and fresh flowers adorning the table.
As I was in the throes of my hostess prep, I read this fantastic post by Amy at The Anxious Hippie, and she shared the most beautiful sentiment regarding perfection: If you're one of those people who appears perfect, everyone probably
hates you, because vulnerability is what makes us relatable and likable. Bingo! Isn't that so completely true?
I think about a few people that I know that "have it all together" - you know the type, always perfectly manicured, wearing the perfect outfit, and seemingly doing more before 10am than I do in an entire day. But, being around them makes me feel anxious and sub par. When I'm with people who don't hide their flaws & fears and are therefore vulnerable, I feel comfortable and relaxed. So, why not be that kind of a friend to others? Why not say to my guest "let's chat while I make up your bed" instead of setting a ridiculously early alarm to have it all picture perfect before they arrive?
This, of course, is one tiny step on my journey to accepting myself for who I am, but an important one. Letting our vulnerability shine is something we can all do for each other, and in the world of the Facebook & Instagram "highlight reel", it's something we could all stand to do a little more of.
{Image via Pinterest}
As an introvert and self-described homebody, nothing makes me happier than when things are peaceful and I'm sailing on smooth waters. True, I did better than expected with all of the upheaval in July (moving into a new apartment, a week's vacation with 21 members of my family, and a hectic time at work), but right now, I'm happily reveling in the fact that things are calm.
I've been filling my days with the things that make me happiest and because of this have been more rested, more productive, and more satisfied.
- Curling up with a good book (right now I'm reading Rules of Civility, which has transported me to NYC in 1938)
- Savoring a mug of tea (Earl Grey is my favorite at the moment)
- Making the bed and putting away the dishes every morning (what can I say, I like things to be tidy!)
- Taking a walk after dinner at twilight in my new neighborhood
- Planning a fall getaway for late September (Charlottesville!)
- Getting up a little earlier & taking time getting ready for work
- Battling my longer commute with fantastic audio books (I just finished Eleanor & Park... so good)
- Curating a library wait list a mile long (the library is one block from my new apartment)
- Unsubscribing from dozens of email lists so my inbox is less cluttered
- Listening to great music while slogging through my to-do list at work (The Civil Wars, Sara Bareilles, Kodaline, Savoir Adore)
While I know
this period of simplicity won't last forever (in fact, it might not even
last past this weekend!) I'm going to do my best to create these
restorative moments for myself even when chaos resumes.
July was a fantastic month for me. I celebrated the 4th with dear friends, sangria, and karaoke. I spent a week at the beach with 22 (!) members of my family. I celebrated a birthday. I purged, donated, packed, and moved my belongings into a new apartment with my beau. The calendar was full and bursting at the seams, and this time, I reveled in it instead of letting it overwhelm me.
But, as the calendar flips and a new month begins, I want to set a few goals and intentions for this last month of summer. August will be a more relaxed month for me, a chance for me to slow down and reset.
+ Watch quality TV (House of Cards, Orange Is the New Black, and Call the Midwife are on tap)
+ Take advantage of the fact that a library is a block away (books & audio books, hurray!)
+ Schedule fun social activities, like brunch, coffee, or ice cream dates with friends
+ Organize my new planner for upcoming months
+ Be more adventurous in my new kitchen, cook a few new recipes
+ Get outside for morning walks or evening walks after dinner
+ Never turn down an opportunity for an ice cream cone
Happy August, friends!
{photo taken at the beach last month}
