Several months ago, a friendship ended with a person that I long considered to be my best friend. It wasn't my decision, but the best thing I could do for this person (and ultimately myself) was to just let it go. I've been on an emotional roller coaster about it since it happened, but the biggest struggle I faced was feeling lonely without my best friend, really feeling the void that this person had filled. In a way, it was like a break-up, but harder in a sense because it was with a person I'd known for 80% of my life.
I was recently reading an interview with Mindy Kaling, who I adore, and the article touched on the subject of her mother's battle with cancer and their final words before she passed away. “I said to her, ‘Mom, I’m going to be so lonely without you. And she just said, ‘You have to be your own
best friend. If you always remember that, you will always have someone
there with you.’”
Isn't that simple, yet so powerful? Our relationship with ourselves is truly the most important and fundamental one that we will ever embark on. We've got to do our best to truly love ourselves and give ourselves the priority, acceptance, and care that we give to others. I often find that I don't do this: I'll give great advice to others and not take it to heart myself, I won't realize when my stress level is sky high, and I am content just plodding along, day after day.
Is the voice inside yourself saying kind things, as you'd say to a dear friend, or speaking harshly and negatively, the kinds of things you'd never say to anyone else? This week also is the beginning of Lent, and I've decided that instead of giving up something tangible, like cheese or shopping, that I will "give up" the negative self-talk and strive to be more aware of that inner voice.
I'm extremely blessed to have a loving family, an incredibly supportive boyfriend, and the dearest friends, both near and far. But the relationship that I'm most thankful for today is the one that I'm cultivating with myself. As Oscar Wilde says, it's the beginning of a lifelong romance.
{Image via Pinterest}
3 comments:
Have you read Mindy Kaling's book? I'm reading it now, and I'd be happy to send it to you when I'm done if you haven't gotten to it yet.
@Rachel, yes, I've read (and loved) it. Thanks for the sweet offer. :)
What a wonderful reminder. I try to take good care of myself, especially lately, but the reminder to be your own best friend isn't one I think of enough. Thank you, Sarah.
PS Dinner at Chipotle is the best Valentine's tradition I've ever heard.
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