A Fresh Start

In previous years, I haven't really enjoyed the concept of making resolutions. To me, the focus always seemed to be on how we were deeply flawed and needed to "fix" ourselves in the coming year -- lose weight, save money, be the best versions of ourselves possible -- all just because the calendar flipped to January. I'm a big fan of the fresh start, but the fact that it can come at any time of the month, year, or week. 

Something about this year was different. For starters, I happened upon Lara Casey's blog and her phenomenal goal setting techniques. So, I opened up a new note in Evernote and just started typing -- what worked in 2013? What didn't work in 2013? Believe it or not, the words flowed freely, and I realized that 2013 was a big year for me and started momentum that I'd like to keep going.  

Here are part of my lists of what worked and didn't work for me last year: 

WHAT WORKED IN 2013 Highlights and things I’m proud of 

• Moving in with my boyfriend & taking a step forward in our relationship 
• Letting go of my  25 year friendship with my former best friend 
• Investing in my mental health & taking great strides in controlling my anxiety
• Reading 37 books 
• Traveling to California & Charleston 
• Singing in an alumni musical theater showcase at my college 
• Doing the 30 day yoga challenge 
• Watching quality TV - House of Cards, Scandal, Downton Abbey
• Investing in my friendships (girlfriends & couple friends) 

WHAT DIDN’T WORK IN 2013 Room for improvement 

• Work/life balance
• Mindless TV watching & social media checking 
• Oversleeping & running late to work  
• Letting other people's emotions control my own
• Having a negative attitude at work 
• Comparing myself to others 

I'm thankful for the inspiration that is surrounding me at this time of the year -- on blogs, Pinterest, and Twitter, as well as in "real life" around me. I think the process of reflecting on 2013 and looking forward to 2014 is a process I'll be continuing as the year progresses. 

Happy fresh start, friends! Let's keep this inspiration and reflection flowing all year long. 

{Image via Pinterest}

Be Present

It just feels like time is zipping by, doesn't it? Unbelievably, we find ourselves at the beginning of December, that month that is fill to the brim with parties, cookies, and to-do lists. This year more than ever, I've been hearing and reading more and more about slowing down and simplifying. So what if we don't send Christmas cards? If our cookies are store bought and not homemade? If the dress we wear to the holiday party is the same as last year? 

I recently happened upon Lara Casey's blog, which I absolutely love. She is doing a month-long project called #PresentDecember, encouraging others to gift others with being present instead of simply with a present. Reading her post really hit home, and has caused me to reflect on how I focus my attention both during this time of year and all year long. 

Put your phone down. Close your computer. When something great happens, don’t say, “I wish I would have had my camera,” say, “I’m so grateful that just happened!”  Look people in the eyes and give them the gift that changes things." -Lara Casey

How often am I mindlessly scrolling through Instagram or Facebook when I'm actually face to face with someone else? How many times have I gotten overwhelmed with the thought of holiday logistics or gift buying? The moments that I will remember from this holiday season are those where I connect with others -- when I savor a mug of tea with my mom, smile genuinely in a photo with my lady friends (who cares what we're wearing!), or chat with my dad as he makes over easy eggs for a late morning breakfast. 

My goal for this final month of 2013 is to slow down, savor, and be fully present. I know this will be a work in progress for me, but it's my intention as the month begins. 

{Image via Pinterest}

A Calm Life

"Keeping up with the Joneses" is no joke when you're in your 30s. It can appear that everyone is getting married, buying houses, having multiple babies, taking luxurious vacations, and decked out in the latest trends. In my world, I am pretty proud of myself when I make the bed, get to work reasonably on time, and manage to go to Trader Joe's on the weekend. But, as I've steadily been learning these past few months, it's okay to be happy with a calm life. 

This past weekend was one that was almost "ideal" for me -- a weekend that left me feeling connected, relaxed, and prepared for the week ahead. I didn't really do anything thrilling, I spent a lot of time at home and yet felt calm and peaceful as I got ready for bed last night. My handbag was cleaned out and organized, the fridge was full of food for the week, a good book awaited me on my nightstand, and there were fresh sheets on the bed. For me, that's about as good as it gets. 

As an introvert, finding things that "refill the well" and leave me recharged and ready to conquer a busy day or week are extremely important. While I enjoy socializing and especially one-on-one time with friends, too much socializing and not enough time taking care of things for myself leaves me feeling out of balance. Building time into my schedule as intentional downtime is absolutely essential to me. 

My favorite things that help keep me balanced (and that I try to make time for every week, if possible) are: 

+ Spending a weekend morning in bed with a cup of tea and a good book 

+ Setting aside time to tidy the apartment and go to the grocery store on Sundays 

+ Keeping my TV watching more intentional (i.e. just the shows I watch regularly and not mindless channel flipping) 

+ Spending the last 15 minutes of every work day (and 30 minutes on Friday) prioritizing my tasks for the next day 

+ Listening to audio books on my long commute 

+ One-on-one coffee dates with my favorite lady friends 

+ Literally scheduling downtime through the week or weekend, to spend as I please, not just time that happens to be available as it happens 

Because of this, I tend to not make very many social plans throughout the week and to be okay with only a few plans during the weekend. I also feel much better when things are tidy and in order (i.e. the dishes done and the bed made). Several weeks ago, I was home on a Friday night doing laundry and it struck me just how content I was doing just that. Other people were likely out clacking around in heels and sipping expensive martinis, but I was 100% happy with matching socks and watching Scandal. 

And so I realize, it really is okay to be happy with a calm life. After all, isn't life all about finding the things that make you happy, peaceful, and calm? I'm not saying I never feel the need to be out and about with red lipstick on, but I'm finding more and more of what makes me happy and making those things a priority. 

Wishing you a happy, relaxing week filled with the things you need. 

{Image via Pinterest}

Sweater Weather

I realize that it's super popular to love fall at the moment - commercials for Pumpkin Spice Lattes, Pinterest boards full of boots/leggings/scarf outfits, and Instagram feeds of mini pumpkins are taking over the internet. But for me, my love affair with fall is a long-standing one. Something about the crisp air and rich colors suit me, and my energy is always high during this time of year. Now that it seems we've officially made it through our Indian Summer and are firmly planted in sweater weather, I'd like to share what I'm looking forward to this month. 

+ Sleeping with the windows open and an extra blanket at the ready
+ Wearing dark nail polishes 
+ Eating apple cider donuts, pumpkin bread, and apples
+ Drinking a mug of hot (herbal) tea in the evenings 
+ Lighting candles when I get home from work 
+ Making soup in my big red soup pot 
+ Curling up with a blanket & a good book (currently reading Unbroken) 
+ The return of fall TV (my favorite shows are Scandal, The Mindy Project, and HIMYM)
+ Coloring my hair a little richer and darker 
+ Rediscovering favorites in my closet 
+ Appreciating the changing leaves on my commute to & from work 
+ ... and maybe enjoying a Pumpkin Spice Latte or two 

I hope you're enjoying the start of this wonderful season, and have a great week! My dad & stepmom are coming into town this weekend for a visit, and I'm looking forward to spending some quality time with them while enjoying some of the things listed above. 

{Image via Pinterest}

Favorite Things

Evernote 
How has my list loving self stayed away from Evernote for so long? While I am a paper planner gal, I love making lists about everything - and Evernote allows me to keep that all in one place, categorize them, and access them from my phone, iPad, and multiple computers. 

Coco Chai Rooibos by DAVIDsTEA
With the weather finally taking a turn for actual fall, I love having a cup of tea in the evenings. This is my go-to tea at the minute, a lovely rooibos chai with coconut. I personally love it in a "latte" with frothy coconut milk. 

Sisterland by Curtis Sittenfeld
I've really enjoyed Prep & American wife by this author, and Sisterland is no exception. I'm currently listening to it on audiobook on my commute to & from work, and I find that I'm actually looking forward to my time in the car! 

Deborah Lippmann Modern Love nail polish
This polish is the perfect fall neutral, lasts a long time without chipping, and flatters my skin tone. A big thank you is due to Ashley on this one, who never fails to recommend the best nail polishes. 

Uniqlo legging pants 
I am totally living in these pants, which are reasonably priced, extremely comfortable, and come in a wide array of colors. It looks like you're wearing skinny jeans, but they are actually as comfortable as yoga pants. I must give credit to the fabulous Nerdy Hipster Princess for bringing them to my attention. I may never wear regular pants again. 

Dior Lip Glow Color Reviver Balm
Oh, this lip balm is a perfect 10 in my book - moisturizing, long lasting, smells delicious, and creates the most beautiful natural pink on my lips. The downside is that it's a little pricey, but for something I use every single day, I think it's worth it. 

What have you been loving recently? 

Vulnerability vs. Perfection

I've been thinking a lot lately about the concept of "being perfect". As anyone close to me knows, I can be a bit of perfectionist (read: high strung Monica Gellar). I greatly dislike finding that I've made a mistake at work, upset a friend, worn the "wrong" outfit to a social gathering, or not done everything in my power to make something the best it can be. But recently, a busy schedule and preparing for out of town guests has made me realize that it's time to let go of my eternal quest for perfection. 

My beau & I hosted friends from out of town this past weekend in our cozy (i.e. 800 square foot) apartment. Since I had only been living there a month, I barely felt comfortable myself, let alone ready to double the capacity and play hostess. I started stressing out, picturing the mountains of work to be done - cleaning, making sure the kitchen was stocked with ideal snack & breakfast options, and even buying items to make certain everything is in order. But then, after a particularly heated conversation with my much more logical beau, I realized that the MOST important thing I needed to prepare was my attitude. Being in good spirits and not stressed out would make a much larger impact than a perfectly timed breakfast casserole and fresh flowers adorning the table. 

As I was in the throes of my hostess prep, I read this fantastic post by Amy at The Anxious Hippie, and she shared the most beautiful sentiment regarding perfection: If you're one of those people who appears perfect, everyone probably hates you, because vulnerability is what makes us relatable and likable. Bingo! Isn't that so completely true? 

I think about a few people that I know that "have it all together" - you know the type, always perfectly manicured, wearing the perfect outfit, and seemingly doing more before 10am than I do in an entire day. But, being around them makes me feel anxious and sub par. When I'm with people who don't hide their flaws & fears and are therefore vulnerable, I feel comfortable and relaxed. So, why not be that kind of a friend to others? Why not say to my guest "let's chat while I make up your bed" instead of setting a ridiculously early alarm to have it all picture perfect before they arrive? 

This, of course, is one tiny step on my journey to accepting myself for who I am, but an important one. Letting our vulnerability shine is something we can all do for each other, and in the world of the Facebook & Instagram "highlight reel", it's something we could all stand to do a little more of. 

{Image via Pinterest}

Smooth Sailing

  

As an introvert and self-described homebody, nothing makes me happier than when things are peaceful and I'm sailing on smooth waters. True, I did better than expected with all of the upheaval in July (moving into a new apartment, a week's vacation with 21 members of my family, and a hectic time at work), but right now, I'm happily reveling in the fact that things are calm. 

I've been filling my days with the things that make me happiest and because of this have been more rested, more productive, and more satisfied.

• Curling up with a good book (right now I'm reading Rules of Civility, which has transported me to NYC in 1938) 
• Savoring a mug of tea (Earl Grey is my favorite at the moment) 
• Making the bed and putting away the dishes every morning (what can I say, I like things to be tidy!) 
• Taking a walk after dinner at twilight in my new neighborhood
• Planning a fall getaway for late September (Charlottesville!) 
• Getting up a little earlier & taking time getting ready for work 
• Battling my longer commute with fantastic audio books (I just finished Eleanor & Park... so good)
• Curating a library wait list a mile long (the library is one block from my new apartment)
• Unsubscribing from dozens of email lists so my inbox is less cluttered
• Listening to great music while slogging through my to-do list at work (The Civil Wars, Sara Bareilles, Kodaline, Savoir Adore)

While I know this period of simplicity won't last forever (in fact, it might not even last past this weekend!) I'm going to do my best to create these restorative moments for myself even when chaos resumes.